Boyfriend

Once again, I have a boyfriend.
Its intresting. I used to measure my life in boyfriends. Its not like I measured it in years, or days, or months. It was in boyfriends. Someone would talk about some event and I would say "Yeah, thats when I was dating so and so" My life revolved around boys. It revolved around feeling loved and feeling wanted and feeling like I was deseriable, at least to one person at that time.
I'm not sure I want to do that again.
Don't get me wrong. I really like boyfriend. He is a super awesome guy. He is tall and wonderful and sweet and a perfect gentleman. And I was his first kiss. And I can't break his heart, even tho it is inevitable at this point.
ugh.
more later.